


The Real Test is If He Stands

by tigerbright



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Foreshadowing, Friendship, Philosophy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-05
Updated: 2014-12-05
Packaged: 2018-02-28 05:36:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2720672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigerbright/pseuds/tigerbright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remembering the fallen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Real Test is If He Stands

**Author's Note:**

  * For [grav_ity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/grav_ity/gifts).



> Spoilers through Season 3, Episode 20, "Citadel Rescue."

**_And yet, attachments also strengthen us._ **

==

Narrator:

Storming the Citadel!

In an attempt to rescue Jedi Master Even Piell and his valuable data from the Separatists, the team of Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Ahsoka Tano, Commander Cody, Captain Rex, recently promoted ARC troopers Echo and Fives, and astromech R2-D2 entered the heavily fortified Citadel and worked their way through, only to be defeated and captured themselves. In the end, after heavy losses among the clone troopers and the death of Master Piell himself, they themselves needed rescue.

[Shots of Charger falling down the cliff onto a mine, Echo running to protect the shuttle as it is blown up, Fives gazing at Echo's helmet, Longshot caught in the electrified force field, Ahsoka with Master Piell as he dies, and a battle droid bowing to R2-D2.]

In the aftermath, clones, Jedi, and one small droid must count their losses.

==

"...Barriss, Mortis is the strangest place I have ever been. I can barely remember some of it -- and then, there are other things. The Daughter was beautiful, and glowed with light... but at first, she was as ready to destroy us as the Son was." Ahsoka shuddered at the memory.

"Master Luminara has spoken of the need for balance. If either the Light or the Dark gains, then there is no longer balance. It sounds as though the Father were trying to preserve the balance and thought that Master Skywalker, like himself, could carry that balance within himself."

Ahsoka looked down and picked at the remains of her lunch. "I know that when the Son took my will, all I could do was get angry. Master Skywalker called me Snips and I nearly killed him. Well, I couldn't actually have killed him, even with the power of the Dark Side, but still. I knew I was truly back to myself when he called me Snips and it was just annoying."

The hologram on her desk nodded, twirling noodles from her own lunch around chopsticks. "Master Luminara has been known to tease me from time to time when I get too solemn. Other times --" her eyes twinkled "-- other times, she tells me to call you and get cheered up."

Ahsoka laughed, but pensively. "What do you think about balance, Barriss?"

The other padawan looked down, and her hood half-hid her face. "We are supposed to be peacekeepers. You and I -- you and I do a little better with our lightsabers than our words. But we still believe in keeping the Dark Side at bay. And perhaps that's what balance means; not wiping the Dark Side out, but rather keeping it from overturning the Light." She looked up and met Ahsoka's eyes. "And if we had no dark, I for one would have a very hard time sleeping."

Ahsoka groaned. "Ana-- Master Skywalker never believes me when I tell him you have a sense of humor, you know."

"Humans have a very provincial view of the universe," Barriss agreed. "He probably has a hard time seeing you and Master Shaak Ti as both being Togruta, even."

"Sometimes I think you're lucky that your master is from the same planet as you are."

"Mirialans can be provincial too. I think you have a broader experience than I do, even surrounded by Humans most of the time."

Ahsoka looked ready to argue the point, but jumped as her communicator chimed. "I have to run. I promised Rex and Fives that R2 and I would come to the barracks today."

"I envy you your camaraderie with your clones, Ahsoka. I think it comes from that broader experience. Master Luminara has taught me many things, but easy friendship is not part of my studies, any more than recklessness is."

Ahsoka laughed too. "Even through a hologram, I know you're teasing me, Barriss. You and Master Luminara care about everyone... even little droids maintaining reactor cores."

Ahsoka's communicator chimed again, and R2-D2 rolled through the door, bumped Ahsoka's leg gently, and trilled. "Right, you've been waiting, and you've been very patient." Ahsoka patted the droid. "May the Force be with you, Barriss."

"And with you." The hologram winked out.

Anakin caught up to them in the hall. "Hey Snips. Give my condolences to Rex and Fives and the others."

"I will." R2 chirped agreement. "Master... why don't you ever come with us?"

"The clones have only ever known me as a standoffish reckless twit, you know. Ask Cody. Ask Rex. Heck, ask both of them."

Ahsoka laughed. "SERIOUSLY, Master."

He looked off into the distance.

"Ahsoka... back on Chrystophsis, Rex went from calling you 'youngling' to 'kid' in the course of a day. In his eyes, you went from being a Jedi newbie to a cadet under his wing. You're special to the troops in a way most of us can't be." He grinned at her. "And, thankfully, you have ME for a master rather than some stuffed shirt like Obi-Wan, so you haven't been talked out of it."

She smiled. "Always bringing it back to you, Master."

"I know you couldn't do it without me, Snips." R2 scoffed. "Don't stay up late. We have more training in the morning."

"You know I have to stay to the end. But I'll still be able to jump through whatever hoops you set for me."

"You'd better!" Anakin waved and turned the other way down the hall. Ahsoka and R2 continued to their transport.

==

Rex looked around the common room and took a breath. This didn't ever get any easier. He stood and rapped on the table, and the brothers all turned to him. "At ease." He paused to clear his throat. "The disagreement between the Jedi Council and the Supreme Chancellor has the 501st and the 212th benched for a bit, so it's as good a time as any for a Remembering."

He looked around the room. A trooper dressed in a gray uniform stood. "Spider."

"I've been on Captain Tarkin's staff since he came back to the Navy, but I started out in Sokka Squad with JJ, who came aboard with Master Piell. Sure didn't want to see him shot in the head when we were recaptured by Osi Sobeck.

"Now, I'm not much of a storyteller, and I can't spin much of a yarn about him here. That was his thing. He had yarns as long as your arm about things he had and hadn't seen. And the thing with this galaxy is, you never know what's true. A couple of Jedi being able to pull troop carriers out of destroyed buildings? Sure, we've all seen them do it. One Jedi pulling it from half-way around the planet? Well, JJ could still make you believe it.

"He had a new story when we met up again. There was this padawan, Nahdar Vebb. Nice Mon Calamari kid. I heard he died fighting General Grievous, so pretty brave, too. And he was a healer; one of the best.

"To hear JJ tell it, though, you'd think that he could raise the dead. He insisted that he had seen the young man revive a trooper who'd been trapped by poison gas, seen it with his own eyes. General Piell laughed fit to bust over JJ's embroideries on that yarn, bulging eyes and all, but allowed that with proper focus, and if it was just a matter of circulation, it was possible to revive a man who seemed dead.

"Well. Wouldn't have helped much for getting shot in the head, even if we hadn't needed to leave him there." Spider looked around and sighed. "I guess we always need to leave them there."

R2 pushed the door to the room open and whistled.

Spider sighed. "Hey. Thanks, little droid. We'd all have gotten shot if you and those reprogrammed battle droids hadn't talked your way in." R2 whistled low.

Spider walked to the memorial wall and took the small laser torch from its magnetic clamp. Under the other Sokka Squad names, he wrote:

> CT-21-9899 / JJ  
>  187th Legion  
>  Died with honor 14 GRS

As Spider finished, Rex turned to acknowledge Ahsoka and R2.

"Kid! Thank you for joining us." Rex clapped her shoulder. "Thank you too, R2." He patted the droid's head. "Take a seat."

Ahsoka perched on a stool near the others, preferring to keep a vantage point. Some were in armor, others in gray bridge uniforms, and others, like Rex, never took off all of their armor in public.

Fives took a deep breath and stood. Rex nodded to him.

"So as Captain Rex probably remembers, we were a little bored at the Rishi outpost before things got interesting. Sergeant O'Niner kept us in line, but that didn't stop Cutup and Echo from playing little practical jokes here and there. We were so tired of being shinies. We wanted action.

"One day, Cutup discovered that the Sergeant had a stash of candied bofa fruit. He wasn't going to take it, of course, but he worked hard at earning it. Echo caught on and started trying to outdo him. I don't think any bored shinies ever worked so hard at a listening post. They even outdid Hevy. Droidbait and I egged them on, and Hevy started dropping hints when the Sergeant was around about how well his squad was doing.

"The Sergeant knew we wanted something, and really, there wasn't much that was special on Rishi. He let Cutup and Echo have a couple of pieces of bofa, and they shared it with the squad.

"And then... well, you know the rest." Fives walked over to the memorial wall and found the names of the dead shinies from Domino Squad. As Spider had done, under those names, he wrote simply,

> CT-21-0408 / Echo  
>  501st Legion  
>  ARC trooper  
>  Died with honor 14 GRS

A member of Bravo Squad told a story about Longshot and engraved his dates. The list went on, and the wall grew more crowded, for the Citadel was not the only recent mission.

When all of the brothers had been honored, the assembly stood. Water and tea glasses were passed forward to droids who took them to the kitchen. Cider was poured for all but Ahsoka, who had promised to see everyone safely to their berths.

Rex nodded to Cody, as ranking officer. "To our brothers," Cody said hoarsely.

"To our brothers," they echoed, and drank.

At a nod from Cody, R2-D2 struck a ringing note. The brothers formed up and began their anthem.

> _Hold the line - don't retreat and don't surrender_  
>  _Hold the line - though around you others fall_  
>  _We will give our last full measure_  
>  _May the fates all treat us kind_  
>  _So hold the line, my boys, just hold the line._

Ahsoka looked out across the room full of brothers. She wove her way through the room, stealing hugs from Rex and Cody, placing gentle hands on some shoulders and clapping others, squeezing hands that reached up to clasp hers.

"Thank you, Commander, for coming."

"Thank you, Captain, for letting me be here."

We Jedi could not survive this war without these men, she thought. Their attachments bring us all together.

==

"...Master Obi-Wan, with respect, attachment is not an automatic trip to the Dark Side!" Ahsoka protested.

Anakin glared at his teacher in turn. "How can I teach my padawan if you argue with her when she's grieving?"

"Anakin, just because you have control despite your emotions doesn't mean you're successful at modeling that control to your padawan. She has to learn!" Obi-Wan did not quite stamp his feet.

Ahsoka, tired of their argument, sought out Master Yoda instead.

"Master Yoda, am I wrong to mourn clones? Is my attachment to them too strong?"

"Fear not, young padawan. Your perceptions, to your credit they are. But, careful you should be. Losing one you are close to may bring out your anger." He paused, twitching an ear. "Anger, a path to the Dark Side is. This is why attachments are difficult for Jedi."

"It's not fair, Master Yoda."

"Born they would have been, without this war? Here they are now. Soon will they pass away. To those whose years are short, cherish them we should. People they are, each and every clone. Remember that, young one. Remember."

"I will."

**Author's Note:**

> The chorus sung by the brothers is "Hold the Line" by Terence Chua. The whole song, with MP3, is here:  
> <http://www.khaosworks.org/filk/line.html>
> 
> My husband [teddywolf](http://teddywolf.livejournal.com/) wrote the Yoda dialogue and read the story aloud with me. I am begging him to podfic it and post it to SoundCloud. Other beta readers included our nine-year-old son and seven-year-old daughter. Daughter requested that Barriss and Ahsoka have lunch together, so they did.
> 
> Many thanks to my housemate and best friend [Rubynye](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Rubynye/) for general cheering on, taking notes on my rambles, and getting me into fanfic in the first place.


End file.
